"Hill Country Thoughts:Walking Daily With The Lord -Thoughts, Hopes,and Living in the Real World" "Without having seen Him, you love Him; though you do not [even] now see Him, you believe in Him and exult {and} thrill with inexpressible and glorious (triumphant, heavenly) joy.
Just sitting here on the porch this afternoon. Sunny, clear skies and crisp, cold wind blowing, but refreshing at the same time. Just sitting here thinking about the awesomeness of our God. Of how He watches over us in all ways, in every area of our life as we walk with Him.
Yesterday reminded me about that old song, about how the Lord keeps His eye on the Sparrows. How He watches over us.
Yesterday afternoon a propane truck pulls up into my driveway, so I went to talk to the driver because I know I did not order any propane but she told me that they received an order for propane, 100 gallons and it was already paid for. I was totally floored because I have not had any propane since June. I was using a hot plate and a microwave to cook and heat water for bathing, shaving and so forth. It sort of took me back to my days in the Army and United States Marine Corps
To go from sponge bath to a full fledge hot shower, let me tell you, that was a bit of heaven for me. So what a blessing of God’s provision. I have no idea of who sent it but I sure do thank the Lord for putting it on their heart to do so. Now I can do some real cooking, instead of microwaving everything.
As many of you know I am still going through the whole process with social security. Waiting for a hearing with a judge now. Just don’t know when it will take place. The Lord has been with me through all of this. He has and is making the way and the provisions for my needs.
I have not worked since February 2003, not by choice, just a result of all that I have gone through over the last two and a half years with the battle with cancer. I have been cancer free. I will be going to the doctors on December 15th to see the surgical team, the ostomy team and Med Oncology team, to have tests to make sure I am still cancer free and that the ostomy is doing ok.
I still suffer a lost of strength because of the chemo and the radiation treatments I went through but I am a lot stronger now then I was two and a half years ago.
And now I am at a place in my life where I have had to put my trust totally in the Lord in all things. It has not been easy but I can say that my Father has been there for me every step of the way!
I am saying all of this to say that we can put our trust in our Father. To know that even in the times of doubt, of fear, when it seems everyone and everything is against you, our Father will be there.
That He will bring us to the place He wants us, to fulfill His call and purpose in our life. In my case, Hill Country Thoughts was birthed out of all of this, and out of the ashes of what look like defeat, life came forth because my Father has brought me through the furnace of affliction and now I feel like He is in the process of taking what has come out of the fire and polishing it, putting on the finishing touches so that when He is through that which will be seen, will be the Christ within, that others will see the reflection of that new life, that new creation.
I want to encourage you my friends today to not turn back, do not flee from these times of going through the fire, for when you come through you will be able to look back and see from where you came, to where you are now and that time of mourning will be turn into joy.
He will bring us to a place that we know Him and not just about Him and we will see the fulfillment of God’s purpose in us.
It is not a time of turning back but a time of pressing in and pressing on and standing in the promises of the Lord, of His word and the things that He has spoken to us.
We are to close to turn back. The Lord is bringing us to a place that we know, that we know, that we are where the Lord wants us, right in the center of His will and it is at this point that we abandon ourselves to Him and say lead on Lord, lead on. Sink or swim, we will follow you.
Rise up my friends and be strong in the Lord, in His strength and in His power and watch our Heavenly Father work on our behalf when we press on and press in and trust Him.
Sitting on the front porch this morning, in my favorite chair, listening to the sound of a multitude of birds. All making different sounds but blending together in harmony, beginning the day with morning songs.
No wonder the Lord used so many things around Himself, to share stories or thoughts to make a point. Sometimes we would get it a right away and at other times, we have to ponder on it, dwell on it and then the Spirit of the Lord will reveal it and all of a sudden the light of our mind will go on and we say, I got it, I understand and then we wonder, “Lord can it really be that simple?”
And often times the Lord will let us know it is that simple. That we have a tendency to complicate things rather than trusting and simply taking the Lord at His word.
One of the the things I feel the Lord speaking to me this morning is the issue of words, of the things we speak, the promises that we make.
Are we a people of our word? Are we a people that keep our promises? Can others count on the word that we speak? That they know that when we speak, make a promise, that they know that it will be done or will they say when we walk away, “I have heard that before, I will believe it when I see it!”
I am finding more and more that it is better to say if I can be there, I will be there, or I will see what I can do, rather than saying all right I will be there, I will do that. Because to give our word and not do it leaves a bad taste, a bad witness concerning the words that we speak.
I can look back over my life and I see how many times I have fallen short, but I have also seen over the last two and a half years how the Lord has changed that in my life. God gave me a wake up call.
What I am saying this morning is let us be a people of our words, of the things we speak, let us fulfill that which proceeds from our mouth. If we say we will pray, let us pray, not say we will do it, and because we didn’t write it down, it becomes a lost memory, a lost promise, better yet, let us pray right then and there or even as we are going about the day to lift that before the Lord while it is fresh on our mind.
When we say we will be somewhere, then let us be there, follow through, and if we are not sure, let us say, if possible I will be there, that way we do not offend that friend, that brother or sister in the Lord and we don’t want to end up with a reputation that people will not trust our words.
The same with our Father. Let us learn to keep our word, our promises. Allow Him to teach us to be a people of our word and His word.
Let us be keepers of our word. Let our families, our children, our friends see us as those who keep our word, that they can count on our yes to be a yes and our no, to be no.
That we this day will keep our words, our vows, to fulfill that which we have spoken, especially that which we have spoken as representatives of the Lord!
Sitting on the front porch this Friday evening. Oil lamp lit, a full moon and a calm and quiet night.
Just got back from celebrating Thanksgiving with some very special friends. Jim and Sandy and their children Lasca, James, Annie, Johnathan and a lot of their relatives. I was honored to be able to celebrate Thanksgiving with them. We have known them for nearly thirty years and they are family.
A lot of memories where brought back. Good memories of watching our kids grow up over the years. Sometimes it was hard to tell whose kids were whose at times.
Jim and Sandy are the type of friends who love you, who will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear and then they would go on an love you through the storms, rejoice with you in the mountain top expereinces and walk with you through the valleys.
Sometimes we have to make choices of what we want to remember or what we want to dwell on. I have chosen over the Thanksgiving holidays to remember the many blessings that I have in my life.
For family, for friends new and old, for our children and grand-children. For my Lord who has carried me through the storms and battles and who has and is bringing me to a new place in my life, that I am able to draw strength from His word, from His presence, that gives me Hope that helps me to stay focused on Him.
I am thankful for Hill Country Thoughts and for that which the Lord is doing. For the doors that He is opening and the lives that are being touched and for those who are touching my life with their e-mails, their comments, their words of encouragement and especially their prayers.
I am thankful for a son, Joshua, who kept on keeping on and pushing me and encouraging me to write, to step out, to have faith and to believe. For that son, I am very thankful.
I am thankful for my daughters Gloria and Elise, who also have encouraged me, been there for me, who I know have lifted me to the Lord many times. Thank you kids!!
Thank you my family, my new friends who visit Hill Country Thoughts. Thank you for the many new memories that you are giving me!
It is with a grateful heart that I give thanks to the Lord for all that He is doing in my life!
I am thankful to the Lord, that He has allowed me to go through the things of life. Because of them I am becoming what He has called me to be and that I am where He wants me at this point and time in my life.
That I am in a place that He has become my all in all, my place of refuge, my place of hope, my shelter, my covering, my dwelling place. He is the source of my strength, my God and my Saviour!
What better place could one be but in the hands of God? In a place where in serving Him, we are made free, that we are being set free from the chains of the past, from the wounds of life, from the deep rooted things, that He and only He can remove. Those things that are so deep, that only He can reach, with His nail scared hands and remove and apply the balm of healing by His touch.
I am grateful that my Father loves me so much, that He gave His son, the Lord Jesus Christ, to redeem me, to redeem us and to bring us home, to a place of knowing Him.
I am grateful for my new friends, my brothers and sisters in the Lord, for those who blog by to say howdy, that the Lord has given us this tool called the Internet to encourage, exhort, lift up and build one another in the faith, to link us together.
I am grateful for the new friends who drop by Hill Country Thoughts and go away encouraged, that those who don't know Him, will want to know more about the hope within, how in spite of all the battles and things that I am going through, I am at peace, I am learning to be one with the Lord, sharing the hope within.
When I could have chosen to flee, to run, to go in the opposite direction, my Heavenly Father, drew me towards Him. He gave me new life in Christ, new hope and a new beginning and now He is fulfilling the one thing that I truly desire and that is that I might be a pen in His hands to express His heart. That I can look up even this day and see in my heart, the smile of my Father.
Oh, I have a ways to go and many more years and miles to travel yet, but my Father is walking with me each and every step of the way on this path called life. That He is guiding me in new ways, opening my heart that I might see with His eyes, to have His love and compassion for others. That I am beginning to become the father, the grand-father, the friend to others that I was meant to be and hopefully to become the husband that I was meant to be if that is what is in my Fathers plan for me.
I am grateful for all who visit Hill Country Thoughts. May you be encouraged as you walk this path called life. May you see the hope within, that we indeed can live in the real world, live a real life and follow a risen Lord and Saviour.
That we can be real, honest. That we can share together, laugh together, cry together and most importantly hope together. That we can strengthen one another. That we become quick to listen, to pray, to care and slow to speak. That we do not be so quick to judge one another but that with the love of our Father and our Lord Jesus Christ, that we build them up and not tear them down.
That when we don't understand what others are going through, that we lift them to our Father and allow Him to do what He does well and that is to love them, woo them and draw them back to His wide open arms and embrace them with Himself and says "Welcome my sons and my daughters, I have been waiting a long time to hold you."
So many thoughts going on in my heart and mind as I comptemplate the upcoming holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas and birthdays and all that entails and what it means to me during this time in my life. I know that I need to stay focused on my Father, on the Lord Jesus Christ!
As usual, the Lord used a song, to speak to me today. He truly caused me to hear the words of the song, to hear it with my heart and not just my ears. He used this song to remind me that I am to put my trust in Him. The song is “Your The Source of My Strength” by J. Brian Hill.
It opened my heart to the Lord. It allowed Him to come in and again apply the balm of His healing power to the wounds of my heart, of my spirit, those areas which only can be touched by the Hand of God. The song reminded me, that He, the Lord is the source of my strength, the source of my being and I am to put my trust, absolutely, totally and completely in Him.
Even through the tears, He reaches out and touches and heals and sees each tear, each drop. He sees the pain, the hurt, the wounds, the loneliness and the fear, of not just me but of others and He says, “I am here my son, I am here my daughter, I see the tears, the wounds.”
As Brian shares in this song, that when life’s shadows fall on us, that we can give those fears to our Father and when we are overcomed by life, we can craw into the arms of safety of our Father. That He is there.
I know that to some, this may seem strange. A 57 year old man, talking about crawling into the arms of His Father, but when you look at it through the eyes of eternity I am but a child.
And did not our Lord say that, like as a child, we are to come to Him, with that simplicity of faith, of knowing He is there.
That indeed He is the source of our being, and that we are to put our trust in Him, for He is our strength, our life!
Let Him be your source and strength, and don’t me afraid to run and crawl into the arms of safety of our Heavenly Father!
I guess I really never can express how much my front porch means to me now. Most of my life has been spent on the inside in an office or study. There were not many times that I spent outside on the porch, anywhere.
What a haven it has become. A place where the Lord and I get together. A place where I can focus on Him. It has become a place of prayer. A place where friends can gather and have a sense of the presence of God. It has been set aside as a place of fellowship, of sharing, a place where a friend can come and share a cup of coffee and just talk and feel at ease. It has become a place of refuge, a place of safety and I know it is a God thing, that He has made it such.
As I have shared before, when all the clutter was removed and everything cleaned and put into order, the house was anointed and prayed over by my Pastor Scott Bradford and my friend Rev. J.Paul Bruhn. Every area of the house was prayed over, especially the porch.
Since then a peace has settled over my home and in my heart and it thrills my spirit when someone comes by to fellowship, to have a cup of coffee, to sit on the porch and talk and share and especially to pray and to sense that the Lord is in our midst also, fellowshipping with us, making His presence known by His spirit. That to me is awesome.
That our Father gives us the opportunity to pray one for another, to encourage, exhort and lift up others to Him. What a privilege and honor that the Lord has given us and do you know what I have discovered each day, when I come into His presence, that He is there, waiting, anticipating that time of fellowship, a time of heart talks, times of silence, to listen and hear the still small voice of the Lord.
That these times of prayers, of worship are times that our Father is fine tuning us, disciplining us when needed, giving us ears to hear so that we minister to others and in giving out of what He has given to us, we receive so much more in return.
To know that we are learning what it means to walk with our Father and with our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ day by day. That as we spend more time with the Lord, then we begin to conform to Him as He writes His word, His thoughts upon our hearts and then tells us go and give out that which I have given you.
That we are to share the reality of our Lord and Saviour and then it truly becomes a time of Thanksgiving as we look to Him, to the creator of Heaven and Earth and to realize, truly realize, that He, with a smile on His face, that He see’s the Christ within shining forth and drawing others to Him!!
May Hill Country Thoughts become a place of Refuge, a place that you feel at home. May the Lord bless you all my friends and may this Thanksgiving be a time of looking up and giving thanks to our Heavenly Father!!
What another beautiful day in the Hill Country of Texas!
A freshness to the day. A sense that the Lord is indeed in charge and that He has everything in control.
I have a real peace and presence of the Lord. There where a lot of things on my heart and today the Lord took care of everyone of them and for that I am very thankful and blessed.
The phone works again, it uses the cable broadband connection, the re-formatted computer is zipping along and I have power and the Internet provider is taken care of too.
The Lord is really trying to get us to realize that as we walk with Him that He will indeed give us the peace that passes all understanding, that we are to place it all in His hands.
Learning to trust is hard. Learning to let go and walk in faith is hard but the Lord will take care of it all as He teaches us to give it all to Him. Let Him carry the load. Let Him be Father!
As we walk with Him, Like a father, He will bring correction. He will guide us back on to the path as we walk daily with Him.
I think the one thing that I am learning in the latter years of my life, is what it means to be a father, a friend, a grand father and hopefully someday a husband again. For the last two years I have been given the role model that I always wanted, the Father figure that I needed and that is my heavenly Father.
He gave us His son Jesus, our Lord and Saviour as our example to follow. That we might become like Him. To have His love, His character, that we learn to react in the way He would and He has given us His Holy Spirit to walk in His ways.
Is that not awesome! That we can walk in new life, in the power and might of the Lord. That we are and can be renewed each day as we walk with Him!
So indeed it is a beautiful morning here in the Hill Country of Texas!!
Woke up this morning to a very awesome presence of the Lord!
A real awareness of Him as I sat on the porch and watched the sun rising from behind the hills. It was so breath taking to see that which we take for granted, sort of like the air we breathe, the water we drink, we just take it for granted, don’t even think about it.
In our lives, in our walk with the Lord I sometimes think we take the Lord for granted. We forget how important it is to talk to Him as we would a friend. That we will go out of our way to visit with them.
Think about it!!
That is how our Heavenly Father is. He waits expectantly for His children, for His sons and daughters, for us to come to Him, with an expectancy, with hope, knowing that we are getting ready to spend time with our Father. That he wants to hear our thoughts, our hopes, our dreams, the things that we are excited about, our times of despair. He is there anxiously awaiting for us to come into His presence.
How our Father loves to spend time with us and reveal Himself to us through His word, through His presence. That He wants to enable us to walk this path that we call life and He wants to walk with us, to be active in our life if we will let Him.
I think as He walked with Adam and Eve, that they talked, they shared, they laugh together and they knew His voice and that is what He wants to do in our lives. He wants to walk with us. He wants to teach us what it means to be one with Him, to know His voice.
He is teaching us to hear that gentle voice, that says: “Follow me, be one with me today, let me be your comforter, let me reveal my presence to you, my word. For I am here, I am with you!"
"Walking with you on this path that I have prepared before you and today I just want to spend time with you and let you know how much I love you and need you, that it thrills my heart when you come to me and let me know how much you love me. Let me reveal myself to you in all that you are going through. Let us walk together, you and I.”
Why is it we as Christians are afraid to be real? To allow others to know that we are not super saints? That we are involved with life. That there are real battles that we go through. We don’t have a special pass that exempts us from the battles of life.
What makes the difference is how we react! What is our response to these times of trials in our lives? Do we press in? Do we look to the Lord, to the one that we call Lord and Saviour or do we flee, give up, say what is the use and does it really matter?
And yes, it does matter because, one of the things that I have been learning is how we react, will be the factor that gives us the strength, not to walk in our power but to walk in the power and might of the Lord. That He will never let us go through more than we can handle, though we may not see it at the time.
The biggest battle that I am going through right now, over the next month and a half is that of Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. This will be the first time in 29 years that I will not celebrate these holidays with my former wife or my in-laws and it is hard, it really is and I have to fight that feeling of loneliness that rises up every time I think about these holidays. I have to fight the anger that tries to rear it’s ugly head also.
The Lord will be with me, as He has been since all this that has been going on in my life. It is during this time that I must learn what it means to be focused on the Lord, to draw my strength from Him and in this time to bless my former wife, my in-laws, as will as those who seem to have disappeared since all this began. That I am to be an example to our children and our grandchildren, to let them see that indeed Christ within, will enable me to walk this path.
For even in the midst of all of this. I know the Lord will and is giving me peace. He will comfort me and He will embrace me with His presence and let me know He is here for me, for those of us who are walking this particular path in life. If you have friends who have or who are walking this path of divorce, not necessarily by choice.
Remember them, lift them before the Lord and pray for them, for their families, for their children and grandchildren, for the rippling effect of divorce touches the lives of many people.
Show the Love of Christ, see with the eyes of our Lord, listen with the heart of His Spirit and hedge them about with your prayers.
Comfort them with the Love of Christ, that the Lord will take this time of loneliness in their lives and fill it with His presence!!
I just finished reading Psalms 136:1-26 and every verse, twenty-six times, reminds us that God’s mercy endureth forever!
What an awesome promise and reminder to us. That we serve a merciful God. A God who cares, who loves us and who also deals with us with mercy and grace!
That His hearts desire is to bring us back into fellowship and communion with Him. To be one with Him, to a place of hearing that still quiet voice, that prompting within, that says:
“That’s ok my son, my daughter. I know that which you are going through. I know what it feels like to be abandoned but I also know what it is to have fellowship with my children and in my mercy I am bringing them back to me. Not to just know about me, but to know me, to know my heart, my desires and my love.”
The Lord so wants to show us His mercy and grace and He wants us to know His presence in our daily life. That we can truly walk with Him!
I know that it is only as we daily come into His presence, as we read His word, as we allow it to become part of us. Then changes begin within and we begin to walk little by little, focused on Him.
That in serving Him, we are made free. As we give Him all the burdens, the load of guilt and shame, the failures, the wounds and as we lay them at His feet He says to us to rise up and walk, walk in the new life that I have given you, for I am setting you free from the crippling effects of those things that you have carried to long.
He is saying to us this day. Rise up and be strong in the new life that I have given you. For indeed, you are a new creation and you are being conformed to me. Put on the full armour, put on the mind of Christ and walk this day, each day with me.
This is indeed a new day, a new beginning, a fresh start, let us walk together in the ways of the Lord and let the light of His presence be seen in us as we walk in His mercy and grace!
“My son, keep my words: lay up within you my commandments [for use when needed] and treasure them. Keep my commandments and live, and keep my law and teaching as the apple [the pupil] of your eye. Bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart.” - Proverbs 7:1-4 [Amplified Bible]
What an awesome word and how often is the simplicity of the word of God when we come to Him with an open heart and open spirit. That we are focused on Him.
One of the things that I am learning at this point in my life is the freshness of each day. Of rising in the morning and greeting it with the Lord. Even if it is only waking up and laying there in bed for a little while, letting my thoughts be focused and center on the Lord, of learning to become one with Him and just being still in His presence.
I am also learning that often times we make the Word of God more complicated than we should. I am finding that as I begin to focus on the Lord, as I open His word, it becomes alive, it becomes what He intended for it to be all along, a living Word. That Jesus is the Word of God made flesh, and now we have the Spirit of the Lord, to open and reveal the word of God in simplicity, that we are learning to come with a child like faith and believe.
I love to study. I love research, word studies. I have tons of books, commentaries and so forth. But when it is all said and done, I find that the Lord speaks to me in words that I can understand, He speaks in the language of our time. He speaks to me as a father would to a son.
In Proverbs 7:1-4, it is pretty simple. He simply says keep my words, which is action on our part, lay up the word within you, let the word, the commandments, the principles, let them be written on your heart, so in the time that you need them, you have them, you have a resource, a treasure that is within and that you can draw from the well of living water that the Lord has given you.
As we are walking with the Lord. As we are in spiritual warfare, then the word of God, the principles, the truths, the insights that the Lord has given us, that which He has written upon our hearts, that have been engraved and made part of us, they become alive, real and in the midst of the battle we can draw on those resources within that the Lord has given us.
It will give us a boldness in Christ, in that which He has done. In what He has made real to us as we come into His presence. He says keep My commandments and live. In obedience to the Word we are made alive, strong, because we are standing on what has been written on our hearts, it has become part of us. It becomes a sure foundation, unshakable. The Word, His teachings, keep them, again action on our part, as the apple of your eye, center on Him. For the word of God will teach us how to live, to be real people, living in a real world, serving the Creator of heaven and earth.
There is a freedom that comes from being in the presence of the Lord. In opening His word, of focusing on Him that enables us to rise and walk with an assurance, with a peace and rest and knowing that we are where He wants us to be. Even in the midst of the storms, the battles of life. We can have that peace, that rest and that assurance of the Lord.
Let us learn to be one with the Father, with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To walk daily with the Lord, of learning what it means to be a follower of Christ. Of what it means to be one with Him, to be real, to be alive in the Lord Jesus Christ.
He wants us to be real people, living His life and bringing hope, that others can see the reality of Christ within. That we are real, that we are not spiritual fruitcakes. But we are real people serving a real Lord, that we are living a life, that gives us joy, peace, rest and assurance. Yes, even in the midst of the battles, the valleys, the mountains, He is Lord, He is guiding us as we walk the path of life that we are on.
Let others see what is on your heart. Let them see the reality of Christ within. That they will see within us, that which will draw them to want to know more about that peace, that rest, that we have. That it is real, not something that we are saying to look spiritual but rather that we can truly enjoy the life that He has given us and we find our strength in Him, even when we don’t understand why things happen. He is still Lord and He is still there for us.
As we spend time in the word. As we walk with the Lord, He will write upon our hearts His word, and it will become alive and real and a resource that we can draw on at all times. It becomes a tool that we will be able to use as we walk this path we call life and see Christ within.
Yes, that is what is taking place as I am writing this while watching my computer go through a complete reformat and restoration!. A bringing of everything back to its original state.
Is that not what our Father and our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ are doing in our lives? Doing a complete restoration, putting everything back into order, restoring us to that place of fellowship with Him.
He is removing all that is not of Him, those corrupt files of our lives and reformatting and creating a clean heart, and renewing a right spirit within us. That He is reformatting us so that we might reflect the Christ within. That we will be optimized to bring forth and use the gifts and talents that He has given us for His glory!
The reformatting process is hard, we lost a lot of what we thought was important, to have it replaced with that which will allow us to be used to bring forth that which will minister to others. That which will encourage and lift up our brothers and sisters, building up the Body of Christ. How awesome is that!!
So let this be a time of restoration, of being reformatted for the Lord, a time of revival, of new beginnings, of a new life that has been given to us through our Lord Jesus Christ!!
You know one of the things that I realized this morning when I was talking with Pastor Scott and my friend, Lewis, after we were through with our morning prayers. I realized that I truly have a role model, someone who has changed me and is making me what He wants me to be.
I am coming to a place of realizing that all my life, I have been seeking the approval of others, seeking someone who believed in me and then this morning to realize that after all these years, that the role model that I have been looking for all this time is my heavenly Father.
He has been revealing more and more of Himself to me, showing me what a Father is meant to be. He has shown me that I do not need to seek the approval of others, that His approval is all that I need.
As I shared with Scott and Lewis this morning. I have never been as happy as I am now in my life, knowing that I am right where the Lord wants me, that I am in the center of His will. That in the midst of all that has gone on in my life, He is here, He is with me. To walk with me, to talk with me, to share His heart and He lets me share my heart, my dreams, my hopes with Him.
That He is allowing me to open up to Him and allowing Him to mend, remold and reshape me and make me into the vessel He meant for me to be all along.
It is such a joy to be able to write, to share, to lift up, to exalt the Lord and to be able to bless my friends, my brothers and sisters in the Lord as the Lord teaches me to dance with my hands over the keyboards, to share the things that He has written on my heart, that which He has and is making real within and that He is allowing me to share with others the reality of who He is and what He is doing in me and that life will come forth and that it will minister to the hearts of others not because of who I am but because of whose I am!
“Father, thank you for welcoming this prodigal son home and thank you for helping me to become more like your Son. Thank you for the approval that only you can give.”
Have you ever wondered if only people didn’t have to open their mouths how much better off we would be? But that is unrealistic, but sometimes I wish that it was so!!
Sometimes we will say things, not really realizing what we are saying and yet what we meant to be as a joke or lightheartedness wounds the heart of a friend, a family member, people that are close to us and that hurts because you knew in your heart of hearts that you did not mean to wound them.
I feel like I have wounded some friends and in so doing I felt like I greived the Holy Spirit and the Lord and for that I am so very sorry and I ask forgiveness. I also ask forgiveness of my Lord. That He would help me to set a guard upon my lips. That I will speak that which will build up my brothers and sisters in the Lord.
This is why I have not posted in the last day or so because the enemy was trying to convince me to back away but I cannot and I will not because I know this passion to write, to share, to encourage my brothers and sisters in the Lord is a passion that He has put within. I know that I am to share the reality of what the Lord is doing in my life here and now.
There is a passion within that I have never had before. A passion of love for my Lord, for His word and I want to allow the Spirit of the Lord to come forth in what He has me to write. To encourage you my friends, my brothers and sisters in the Lord.
May we all watch the words of our mouth, the things that we say. Let us exhort, lift up each other and encourage one another in the faith.
Let there be healing in the words of our mouth, of the things that we share this day. Let it be words that will bring life and hope to others. That we will build them up in their walk with the Lord and give them strength to walk the path that they are on at this point and time in their lives, to build them up in their faith.
Lift up the downcast, encourage the wounded and apply the healing words of our Lord this day to those that He brings across our path today. Whether in person, on the phone, online. Let us encourage others in all that we write and do!
Sitting here on the front porch tonight. A very cool and very quiet night, with some heat radiating from the oil lamp taking off some of the chill as I write.
I set here pondering a lot of things tonight. Wondering, thinking and remembering, knowing that the Lord is in charge of all that is going on.
It seems so strange. Two people who were part of each others life for nearly 31 years, yet no longer together, yet we live across the street from each other and see each other daily. So near, but so far apart. Yet our God is in charge. He knows the course we are on and He will bring us safely into port.
I can no longer be focused on her. I must be focused on the Lord and yield totally to Him and walk this present path and allow Him to work in her His perfect will.
Yet I am still a covering for her, my children and my grandchildren. The Lord has not released me from that. He has given me a legacy in the Spirit to become all I can be for Him. To watch over them and give them a heritage in the Spirit. To become an example to them of what it means to walk with the Lord.
I speak blessings over my former wife. I lift her before the Lord knowing that He is watching over her and working His perfect will in her life and that she will see God’s fulfillment of all that He has promised her.
I speak blessings to our son Joshua. That he indeed is a man of God, chosen for a time such as this. That He is fulfilling God’s call on his life.
I speak blessings over our daughter Gloria and her family as they begin a new path in their life. That our Father is reaching out and touching them. I speak blessings over our grand-children, Rebekah, Jordan, and Kiean, knowing that the Lord is watching over them and that they too will grow in the ways of the Lord.
And for our youngest daughter Elise I speak blessings, that the Lord will fulfill all that He has spoken to her. That she will see a fulfillment of it and she will see her dreams brought into being and that the Lord will continue to be with Hunter and her, knowing that they both love the Lord. That the Lord will mold them and shape them to be an instrument in His hand and that they will open doors for others.
So I am blessed, though I am alone physically, I am not alone because the Lord is with me as my comforter, my strength, to watch over me, to keep me, even as He is with her. I am a blessed man to have three great children and three wonderful grand-children.
I am blessed to have a Heavenly Father who is the role model I never had before. My hope and my desire is that I will be a role model for my family now as I walk with the Lord in these latter years of my life, that these years will be greater than the former years.
Take time to bless your wife, your husband, your children, lift them before the Lord and leave them a legacy of hope!!
I bet that title got your attention! What is Paul up to this time, what’s on his mind?
It’s true, it is really true! “I am so beautiful!”
Ask my Father. He will tell you I am so beautiful. What trigger that thought? A song of worship, a song of adoration, a song of surrender, a song of total abandonment.
It is one of the songs that are in Luanne Hunt’s book “Moving God Moving Mountains” and will be released in a CD sometime in December.
I had the privilege of listening to these songs and they indeed take you into the presence of our Father. They share the heartbeat of God and focus you in on our Lord and Saviour.
Listen to this with your heart when you read:
Ragged souls are yours Brokenness you desire As I sink into my suffering You become much Higher
I am beautiful, all in Pieces, You run to me I am so beautiful torn apart and drowning in my need
I can identify with this song, and this is just one portion, ragged souls, hurting souls, broken hearts, in pieces, no longer able to carry on, to move, sinking into our suffering and then looking up, allowing Him, the Lord to become much higher.
Though all in pieces and torn apart because of lifes battles, things that I did not understand, in that time of being torn apart within, when all seemed lost, He ran to me, drawing me in my need, lifting me up, he held me and cradled me in His arms and spoke to me and said:
“You are beautiful my son, one of my chosen ones. My children are so beautiful to me, each one unique, each one so precious and I so want to love them. heal them and in this place of brokenness, in this place of dispair, in this time of suffering, they are were I can reach them. I am here to restore them to that which I have created them for.”
Is that not awesome, does that not give you hope? That indeed you are beautiful, for when He is finished we will reflect the Lord. We will reflect His presence, that as we die to self, He will arise within and that it will no longer be I that liveth, but Christ that lives in me, in you and we will then begin to reflect His character, His attitudes as we are conformed to Him. That even in the times of suffering, of brokeness, we are being changed, we are becoming beautiful in Him!
It really has been an amazing week for me as I have been watching what the Lord has been doing in my life, in the battles that are going on, the spiritual warfare that is taking place in me and it is as if the Lord is saying, “Be Still and know that I am God and these battles are mine!”
I am in the battle but observing my Father doing the fighting, giving me the victories over the attacks the enemy has waged against me.
And do you know how I know that He is winning these battles? Because of my reactions, my attitudes. I almost want to look in the mirror and say “are you really sure this is you Paul?”
Tuesday at our monthly Emmaus Community meeting, the one event that I look forward to each month. A couple gave their talk and testimony on marriage and what took place in their lives and how the Lord worked in them. Before, I would have become an emotional wreck and got up and left.
Oh I was in tears but I was also rejoicing in what God had done in their lives, so the enemy lost that battle of trying to bringing distress and depression into my life that night.
I have a dear friend that I talk to often that shared some hard things with me this week, that in times pass I would have gotten very angry and would have shut them out but instead I listened to what the Lord was saying through my friend.
A friend will love you through the battles and help build you and recover from the wounds to move forward. To that friend, I say thank you. Again, another battle won.
And now the current battle, the battle with the computer rages on. The enemy trying to do what He can do shut it down with the attack of a virus which was trying to destroy all my programs and taken up hard drive space. We got rid of that but the system is still under attack.
The computer keeps telling us that we are running out of space on the hard drive. One moment I have 125 megs left out of 18 gigs, and then then the next time, I have more than a gig. So we are trying a couple of things right now and trusting the Lord.
What I am saying through all of this is that I am sort of standing back and watching my reaction to all that is taken place and I know that it is the Lord because everything that has been happening this week is causing me to focus on the Lord and I have a peace, a calmness and assurance that my Father is saying, “That a Boy, that’s the way to go, that is the reaction that I am looking for.”
I feel like I am learning to be more like my Lord, that He is truly conforming me and shaping me to be a reflection of Him, of that which He is doing, that He will bring changes to our hearts, our minds and our attitudes as we press on to know Him even more.
I know there are those around me now who see and know the changes and that they stand amazed, as I do, to see indeed that my Father is indeed in the recreaction business. He is bringing us back into a place of fellowship, of walking daily with Him and with each other.
He is showing us what it means to be one in Him, united in our hearts and our spirits and sharing the Hope of Christ within and His life changing power.
Everything that the enemy has used this week and I mean everything has caused me to run even faster into the arms of my Heavenly Father. What the enemy meant to use to bring me down and cause me to run, has caused me to look up and focus on the one who gave himself for me, “The Lord Jesus Christ, My Lord, My God, My Saviour and My Deliverer.”
You wonder sometimes when the enemy will wise up and realize that we will come to a place of recognizing his tactics.
That rather than getting upset and going to pieces when he attacks, it causes us to begin to worship and praise the Lord and give it all to Him to handle.
Today was a super day. A real presence of the Lord as Lewis, Pastor Scott and I prayed. After we finished praying and they left, I came into my study to check e-mail and begin to write and get ready for the day.
When I turned on the computer, it all of a sudden went haywire, kept doing weird things, telling me basically my space on my hard drive was disappearing and then I got that blue screen of disaster.
I then realized at that moment I was under attack. That the enemy was attempting to destroy my system, corrupt files, take up space and do anything He could do to cause me to panic, give up, quit, not to try and write anything at all. It was a stealth Trojan virus call trojan.byteverify. Somehow it got past my firewall and also my Norton anti-virus program, and I did a complete scan and it caught them and I was able to delete them but the system was still under attack.
Normally I would have gotten really angry and upset but I had a real peace and rest and I know that it was the Lord and it let me know that I am beginning to learn how to react to these events in my life and that the Lord will take care of it as I give it to Him. The Lord is in charge. This is His ministry, His computer and His responsibility and I am learning to trust Him in all things.
I had called a friend for prayer and in the course of talking, it dawned on me that she was a computer person, a system administrator or something like that and she talked me through some things, which I did and got rid of somethings on the computer and then tomorrow they will be over to help me tweak the system and see what we can do. For right now the system is working and for that I am thankful.
I was almost convinced that I would not be able to post today but our Father had other plans and when I put my trust in Him, as I began to praise Him then He took over the situation, even that concerning the computer.
I think the thing that I have learned this day, is that in the times of an attack, turn to the Lord, give thanks and know that He is in control and nothing that the enemy uses against you will prosper.
Oh, we might lost some battles at times, but we will win the war. The battle is the Lords and we will be victorious as we stay focused on Him!!
It is a cool and chilly morning here on the front porch! But it is also a day of sensing the warmth and presence of the Lord.
As Pastor Scott, Lewis and I prayed this morning. There was a sense of unity, of oneness, as we purposed in our hearts to honor our father, to thank Him for this day and for the opportunity to serve Him.
It was also a time that Lewis and I could stand with our Pastor and lift him before the Lord, that the Lord would give him the wisdom for the day, for the things that are set before him to do. To lift up his arms spiritually and be a covering for him through the day as the Lord has called us to do.
I think that is something that we need to do on a daily basis. To lift up those who are in places of spiritual responsibility, that Our Father will give them wisdom, knowledge and discernment in all that is set before them.
It is an awesome thing to be able to stand with others in the faith. To unite with them in prayer, in the word and in God’s purposes, knowing that our Father has called us for a time such as this.
The Lord has called us together to use the gifts and talents that He has given us. In prayer, in exhortation, in writing, in sharing, in singing. That he is linking us together through the Internet, to share the gifts He has given us. That He has called us for a time such as this to help bring the body of Christ together.
It is so amazing to be linked together with brothers and sisters in the Lord in Canada, Australia, England, Scotland, Philippines, Malaysia and all over the United States and the world.
He is linking His people, His Body together, to bring glory and honor to Him. That He is binding us together, that it transcends denominational lines and unites us in our love for the Lord Jesus Christ and builds us together in the Faith, in the life-changing power of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
That we are learning to be real in the Lord. Learning to share out of that which we are going through and then to be able to build one another up in the Lord.
To bring restoration through prayer, through intercession, through just being there and listening and sharing that which will reach out and touch the hearts and souls of others because they can identify with the hurts, the pains, the sufferings that we have gone through and know that there is hope.
That the Lord has and will bring us through all that we are going through, as we lay hold of Him and stand fast in the faith, even when everything around us seems to be falling, yet we stand on a sure foundation.
We stand on the Word of God, on the Lord Jesus Christ, and we hold on with all that is within us knowing, that we will yet rise and be restored and made stronger in our walk and in our faith as we press on and into the Lord and come into the presence of our Father. Indeed our life is in Christ and He is the Rock of our salvation. And we abide in His presence.
Indeed we were created for a time such as this. A time to declare the acceptable day of the Lord, to declare the word of God and the life-changing power of the Son of God, of the Lord Jesus Christ and for the Holy Spirit that has been given to us to give us strength to walk in this day and time.
Let us walk in all that He has for us. Let us walk and stand strong in Him, let us be proud to be called Christians, followers of Christ, the Risen Lord and Savior and let us reflect Him in all that we do this day and every day thereafter!
This is one of those posts that makes you say “Lord couldn’t we write about something else?” Yet I know that this is what the Lord wants me to write and share about today, loneliness!
After 31 years, to suddenly be severed from a relationship, with a stroke of a pen, it is devastating, it hurts and cuts to the inner most part of our being.
To wake up to an empty house, to an empty bed, to be alone, so that the only heartbeat you feel is your own. To not feel the warmth of another person beside you, leaves a gap within that is as wide as the Grand Canyon and indeed, it too is devastating.
You wonder, you begin to look back and say where did we go wrong, when did we become two people drifting apart in the sea of life, like to ships passing but not acknowledging the other. That we allowed the enemy to creep in and do what he does best, destroy lives, destroy families.
It is so easy to get caught up in things that we forget the other person. We forget what brought us together, what drew us and made us to be one.
And now we are alone, both of us. She across the street and me here and yet we see each other daily because of living so close, so that only intensifies that sense of loneliness and what we have lost. And now all the props, all that which I counted on is gone and now I am alone or am I?
The only thing that has given me the strength to walk is the Lord Jesus Christ, That He is filling in the void and given me a peace and comfort that only He can give at a time such as this.
I really had a hard time writing this because I knew that I was exposing more of my life. I mean how real does my Father want me to be? He wants me to be real, to share my heart, to share that which I am going through, what I am experiencing. There is nothing wrong with admitting we are lonely, that we are hurting. How else can we be real with each other? To sit there and say everything is ok, is wrong, it is a lie!
It is only as we take the focus off ourselves and begin to share what we have experienced in our lives that we can help others. Then we can lift them up and let them know that those feelings are real, your not abnormal. You really are feeling the pain of separation, of hurt, of divorce, it is as if a death has taken place.
But we are being drawn to the only one who can give us the strength during these times, the Lord Jesus Christ. We have been given the Holy Spirit to strengthen us, and to fill in that void. That we are being brought back to a place of total dependency on the Lord so that He can work on those areas in our lives that need His healing touch.
As I talked to a dear friend, one who spoke truthfully and honestly with me, I began to realize how far back this loneliness went. Even back to my youth, to my childhood.
For all these years I have been seeking approval of others, that I focused more on myself than others, that it was always about me. I did not allow others into my life, It always was about what I was doing, when in reality what I was doing, was nothing!
So here I am alone, but again, am I alone? Not really. I am in a place now, where the Lord has and is getting my full attention. I am “Him In” by my Father, so that I can become what He has created me for.
To be one of His masterpieces created to reflect the reality of who He is and that He is molding me and shaping me into a vessel that He can use in His hands, a pen to reflect life and hope in a Father who is ever there, ever teaching me and being a role model I never had before.
That with my Heavenly Fathers help, I can become a role model for my son, my daughters and grandkids that I was not before. To realize it is not about me but about Him, about others and what He will do we but allow Him to.
I know when our Father is finished with us, that He will be reflected in all that we do and He will say, “These are my sons and my daughters, I have created them for a time such of this, I have created them to reflect who I am and what I am doing”
Till later,
Paul
Hill Country Thoughts Paul E. Dawn Jr.
Kennesaw, Georgia
Think on This:
“As we spend that time with the Lord, as we ponder His word, it will bring forth fruit in due season, and it will be life to others as we share those things that the Lord has made real in our lives as we walk with Him, as we go through the trials of life, the dealings, as we mature little by little, we will be able to share with others that which has been made real in our life, not theory but the life changing power of the word" - Paul
Words Aloft
Let my words soar on the
rising currents of your spirit
Let my words be powered by the
heart of your inspiration
Let my words lead others on the
incredible journey to your heart
Let my words reflect the vastness
of your Mercy, new every morning!
